Rain on my sunshine

Shit just stirrin around me and I'm tryin to see through the rain. Got a glimpse of sunshine. Got it while experiencin some of that pain. Had a chump pass my path never throught I would see him again. Fool rained on my sunshine. Fool rained on my sunshine. I motioned towards him as he past... Thought I would share a word or two. My stained jersey muffled my mouth and the smell of defeat washed over me again. Fool rained on my sunshine. He doesn't deserve an introduction to my new world, new life, new beginning, without him in it. Fool rained on my sunshine and my ability to become invisible in his eyes is 60+ pounds of yesterday....

Woke up in the mornin and had a convo that turned into tears. Found rain on my sunshine and overwhelming amount of fear. Pushed in the corner dodging the lash, and blocking the debris as it falls in my direction. Convo rained on my sunshine and in that moment all I wanted was protection. shit gets stirred and moved and pushed and tossed in all sorts of direction. Convo rained on my sunshine and in that moment all I wanted was protection. I just don't understand my efforts as they fall short of perfection... My expectations rain on my sunshine, they eventually become self-inflicted weapons. My insides scream and skin tightens with the intensity of each dreaded thought. My past, present and future dance around me creating a dizzy cloud and I'm exhausted in this moment. Man... shit gets hard, gets crazy... spins me out and all I can think about it... I don't wanna ever ache the way I've ached. I don't ever want to drown the way I've drowned. I have forged a wonderful path of self-recovery, self-discovery, and working on improving my life to make me a better person. I am trying... and thats all I have to give. I don't want it to rain on my sunshine. I don't. I'm trying to leave my umbrella at home.